Archive for the ‘Dwight’ Category

Scott headed out for Arkansas earlier this week, and one thing I’m sure of, I am SO thankful for that man.  I honestly do not know how single moms do it! 

Tuesday night I was dealing with Dwight and boy, does he know how to push my buttons sometimes!  We’ve had to keep the house in tip-top shape because we could have showings at any time, so when he let the dogs out and didn’t take his shoes off before tracking mud onto the kitchen floor, I was ticked.  Mostly because I’d just asked him twice if he’d made sure he didn’t let the dogs track mud in the house, and he even went back and checked and told me everything looked good. 

So needless to say, when I went back and found the floor soiled, not just with dog paw prints, but his big fat tennis shoe prints, I was pissed.   And of course, Dwight being Dwight, what does he do?  He starts smiling. 

“Dwight, it’s not funny!  Why are you laughing!  Stop laughing!  This is so irritating for me to have to go over this with YOU, the SIXTEEN YEAR OLD!  This floor needs to be cleaned now!  Why are you still smiling?”

And since he kept smiling, I gave up and sent him to bed.  He tried to stop and explain, but I was in no mood.  “Just go, Dwight.”  I ordered as I cleaned the mess up myself.  That boy, we are just so different, I don’t get him sometimes!

So the next morning, when I saw the sticky note on the table (a sight that always fills me with dread because you never know what the boy is going to write), I prepared myself for his explanation. 

But oh.  Let me tell you…the entire note was of no importance, because what I read in the first sentence was enough…

Dear Mom,

I’m sorry for laughing at you… 

At me?  AT me?  Oh no…he was laughing at me?

Nice.  Apparently I was the funny one. 

Not that the little mud on the floor event ruined my week, but I did find it amusing.  My teenage son thinks I’m funny, only not when I’m trying to be.  No, it has to be at the most inappropriate times that I am funny!

Tonight however, was a bit rough.  I thought we were doing good.  Kids were in bed, America was asleep too, and just as I was about to put her in her swing (because right now we have no crib to put her in and the swing keeps her buckled in safe and sound and asleep!), Joshua comes out of his room crying. 

“Moooom,”  He called as America started to stir.

“Whaaaaat???”  I whined.

“I threw up.”  He squeaked.

I sighed.  “Where?”  I asked.

“On the bed.” 

America was awake by this point, and I headed up to the room.  Sure enough, dinner was sitting in a neat little red pile where Joshua was supposed to be sleeping. 

“Joshua, why didn’t you go to the bathroom?” 

“Because I didn’t know I had to throw up.”  He cried.  “I woke up coughing and it just happened.” 

I sighed (and groaned, and moaned, and whined), again and took America to the boys’ room.  I told Dwight and Patrick to watch her since they were awake anyway, and then went back to pick up Madison and moved her to my bed so she didn’t roll into the…ummmm…half-way digested dinner.

I went back and removed the sheet, took it down stairs, rinsed off dinner down the drain, then threw the sheet in the wash.  Back up the stairs I went as I rummaged through the closet to find a new sheet.  I walked into the room to throw the clean sheet on and as I went to Joshua’s side of the bed to straighten out the sheet, I was surprised by another lovely pile of salmon patties and watermelon nestled in another pile on the floor.

“Joshua!  Why didn’t you tell me you threw up on the floor too?”  I whined as I headed for the closet hiding the steam cleaner.  

“Crap!”  I shouted (And I wonder where my two year old got that one from today)!  I never emptied out the steam cleaner from the last time I used it.  It was mostly the detergent and water, but it still looked gross and I wanted hot water for this mess.  So I went to the kids’ bathroom to pour it out and when I lifted up the toilet seat…eeeeewwwwe! 

“Dwiiiiiiiiiight!”  I shouted.

He came running and I gave him the speech he’s heard a thousand times.

It’s his job to clean the bathroom.  The toilet is disgusting and looks like it hasn’t been cleaned in months.  Clean it, NOW.  Hey, if I was going to be up cleaning puke anyway, he could do his chore! 

I got the steam cleaner put back together, with hot water and detergent and got to work.  I start spraying the solution onto the carpet as I ran over the salmon/melon mixture and waited for the machine to start sucking up the yuckness.  Only there was no sucking, just a soggier puddle of solution and puke.  Great.

The stupid thing was spraying the water great, but for some reason, it didn’t want to suck anything up.  I tried switching the setting from “hand tool” to “floor cleaner” several times, but it did nothing.  Finally, I, cussing up a storm at this point, grabbed the hand tool and started scrubbing away with it.  I could hear the baby crying on and off in the background, and Madison, with all my cussing and carrying on, came walking in.  I told her to stay out of the way, so Dwight, who finished cleaning out the toilet bowl, picks her up and follows me, “Mom, do you want me to put her on the couch?” 

“Oh sure, Dwight, like she’s going to stay downstairs by herself!” 

“Do you want me to put her on your bed?” 

“No, Dwight!  She’s not going to stay there by herself either.”

“Where do you want me to put her?”

Seriously?  She was perfectly fine where she was.  Why did he think he had to put her anywhere? 

“Dwight, just go to bed!”  I finally ordered.  Frustrated, I stopped the cleaner, took it back apart, and found a filter that was somewhat clogged up.  I cleaned it off, and sure enough, that did the trick.

“Thank you, God!”  I prayed.  Because surely I couldn’t have handled trying to clean up that mess with the hand tool much longer!

I spent another 20 minutes fretting and cleaning the redness out of the carpet that will be cleared of any furniture by Thursday of next week.  This was just what I needed, you know, red puke to stain the carpets right before we move out!  I think I got most of it out, but it was a chore. 

It’s just funny, how ironic things can be.  Like earlier today when I was thinking about how I can not handle my kids getting really sick right now – not in the midst of a move, and how God must know that because they seem to be doing okay even though they’ve been exposed to some nasty stuff over the last couple of weeks.  And then later when I thought about the sick sense of humor God has at times. 

I think God was just using His sick sense of humor to make a point (or two) – I apparently can handle the kids getting sick right now, even with my husband away!   Yeah, I had to laugh.  I have a sick sense of humor too, and when God shows his funny side, well, I just can’t help but laugh AT Him. 

Wait a minute…Me?  Laughing at God and His ways of pointing out my mistakes and misconceptions?  It’s funny how different my perceptions can be from the truth!

So that’s what it’s like to laugh at the parent who is trying to make a point.  There is something funny when we realize our misconceptions couldn’t be further from the truth.  Like Dwight saw a “clean floor,” I saw a circumstance I thought I could NOT handle.  The truth is, I’ve made it through much harder situations than this!   I was a bit surprised that I was being proven wrong, and I’m sure Dwight, was a bit surprised to see the mud on the floor after he checked.  How else does a person respond to a surprise, but to laugh?

I may not always get his sense of humor, but I’m starting to realize, maybe Dwight and I aren’t so different after all.  But the difference between God and me, is that I’m pretty sure He doesn’t mind that I am laughing at His ways of getting my attention or pointing out the mess I’ve made in my own little head.  I guess as the parent, I need to learn to laugh along with my son, because I swear I could almost hear God laughing with (but of course, not at!) me as I realized in my own way, I was acting just like my teenage son!


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I got a few good laughs yesterday and just had to share. 

1.  I saw hubby whack his face into his car door.  It knocked his hat sideways and everything.  You know I had to open the door and yell, “I saw that!”  It was so cute.  Kind of reminded me of our so-called “first date” when he walked right into a pole at Applebees. 

2.  Scott and I went out to pick up some Chinese and rent some movies last night when Joshua called. 

“Mom, Dwight is being mean to me.  He’s yelling at me and he cussed at Patrick.”

“What did he say to Patrick?”  I asked.

Josua paused and then asked…”Ummmm, am I aloud to say it?” 

“Yes, Joshua, for the sake of telling me, you can say it this one time.”

“He said, ‘Shut the heck up.'”

“Let me talk to Patrick, okay, Joshua?”

Patrick gets on the phone and I ask, “What’s going on, Patrick?”

“Well, Dwight got ahold of the Sharpie and colored all over his face.  He was trying to draw a beard and moustache and now he can’t get it off.” 

(Control yourself, Melissa.  Don’t laugh yet). 

“Okaaaaaay, but Joshua is calling and saying Dwight is being mean.  Is that true?’

“Well, kinda.  He yelled at Joshua, but now he just went to his room and said he’s not going to clean anymore because he thinks he’s in trouble now.” 

(We told the boys to clean up and we’d play a game when we got home).

So we get home and Scott is asking Dwight what is going on.  They get to the end of their conversation and Scott asks me what I think.  “I just want to know why Dwight thought he was in trouble if he didn’t do anything wrong.”  I said. 

Dwight was at the sink doing dishes and Scott told him to answer my question.  And when he looked up at me and started talking, I didn’t hear a word he said.  I was to busy trying to contain myself.    But it was no use.  “Pfffffffffft!  ha ha ha haha ha!” 

I saw faded marker all over his chin and under his nose.  His skin was red from all the scrubbing he did while we were gone.  And then, do you know what he asks me just a few minutes later?

“Mom, which color do you think looks better on me?  Black or red?” 

I stopped and looked at his face.  “Ummmmmmmm…it’s really hard to say right now.  (Giggle) I guess I’ll go with the black!”

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My husband left me a question on my last post, and there is my answer.  I have been so busy lately.  So busy that I haven’t taken time out to do the things I enjoy. 

But there’s always an adjustment period after bringing home a baby.  I remember when I had Madison, my blogging decreased quite a bit at first.  Eventually I was able to get back into the swing of things, then I had America!  But now that America is 6 months old (can you believe it?), I am hoping that I will be able to get back to some things I love to do! 

So blogging is one of my New Year’s resolutions.  My goal is to blog a minimum of 3 times a week and I’m setting Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays as my blogging days.  There’s just so much I’ve wished I had the time to record into words lately, but I just haven’t had/made the time. 

So tomorrow, I’ll have to post about the killer guinea pig we ended up bringing home.  And today, I’ll leave you with two crazy dreams I’ve had the last two nights. 

Tuesday night I had a dream that I discovered I was pregnant with baby number 7.  I was standing there talking to a friend when I felt it move.  I looked down and saw my belly moving and I just knew.  I rushed to a clinic and they decided to use two different types of tests to confirm my pregnancy.  I could see the results of one of the tests sitting on the counter before they even brought it back.  Two pink lines.

My first thought was, “I just knew I was going to have a fourth baby!  It was just meant to be!”

My second thought was “Oh crap!”  Because I realized that America was just 6 months old and I was already pregnant again…and I’d apparently been pregnant for a while, which meant these babies were going to be very close in age! 

Then I realized we were moving to Arkansas, so I wouldn’t get to stay with my OB here in OH.  I also knew we’d have to move in the middle of my pregnancy.  And Arkansas is not a VBAC friendly state!  So then I started stressing!  Would I have to have a C-Section?  Could I pull off a VBAC?  What about weaning America before the next baby was born.  How was I going to do all of this? 

Then I woke up and whew!  I realized it was all just a stressful dream!

Last night, I had a dream that we were sitting at home and Dwight was sitting on the couch crying over something ridiculous.  Scott and I were so fed up with his dramatic “its-all-about-me” pity parties that we told him to just go to his room.  (For some reason I keep thinking he was crying over a bowl full of cherries).  So he’s off in his room and after a while Scott and I realize he hadn’t joined us for dinner so we called him.  We decided to talk to him about his breakdown and he  had on these weird sunglasses that covered a majority of his face and behaved so strangely.

I finally told him to take off his glasses because his skin just looked weird.  It was yellowish and wrinkly and I wanted a closer look to see what was going on with him.  He refused so I grabbed his glasses and took them off.  Scott and I were taken aback when we were staring at an old man instead of our son!  

The old man turned out to be an evil kidnapper who paid off Patrick and Joshua ($75 each) to keep quiet about his scheme as he tried to pretend he was Dwight in the midst of his kidnapping scheme.  The old man began to mock us and started speaking in Chinese as he did these crazy kicks.  I guess he was trying to scare us but I wasn’t scared.  I lost it with the old man and kept yelling at him to tell me where my son was.  He would not answer and I became so angry and scared for Dwight that I started hitting and trying to hurt this man so that he would give me some sort of information. 

But finally Scott and I decided to check Dwight’s room.  Sure enough, he was sitting on his bed, waiting for us to tell him to come out.  I guess the old man had decided to try to distract us before actually kidnapping him.  The old man ran away, so my mom and I set out to tell the rest of the people in the neighborhood what was going on.  There were kids playing outside all through the neighborhood, so I kept trying to gather the parents together to tell them at once, only they were too distracted to listen to what I was saying.  I was so frustrated and irritated that they didn’t want to listen!  One man kept telling me to hold on, and as I waited at the front of his house, he kept running down the driveway to a car he was working on.  “Just let me replace this engine real quick, and then I’ll be right back,”  He said. 

 I looked at my mom.  “Did he just say he wants me to wait for him to replace the engine?”

There was also another part of my dream where I just needed to get away from everybody, but my mom knew what I was doing and wanted to talk to me.  I decided to run and try to get away from her before she could find me.  I found a secret hiding place in this house that actually led out to an over-grown garden area (weird dreams have a way of changing things up on me!) and tried hiding beneath some overgrown grass.  But she still found me.  She knew exactly where to look and I remember thinking, “That’s my mom.  She always knows just where to find me.  She knows me so well.”

So then we started walking around and we ended up with America on this weird amusement park water-type ride.  At first, America was in this carrier and the ride almost took her to the right side, or the “dangerous” side.  (The side babies were not allowed to ride on).  But my mom grabbed the carrier right in the nick of time!  So she pulled America out of the carrier and held her in her lap as we sat down and waited as we were pulled to the left on this water-type ride.  I remember worrying that it still might be dangerous for the baby, but I held on because it was already too late to turn back.   

And that was it.

Strange dreams.  Not quite sure what to make of it all, but it is somewhat funny.  Old man trying to disguise himself as a 15 year old kid.  Distracted parents, pregnancy, and water rides.  Yeah, I guess you could say my mind has been working overtime the last couple of days!

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It’s a long story…

and I have gone back and forth on whether or not to post anything on this, but I feel like perhaps sharing our experience on my blog will one day help someone else (I hope).  

I don’t have the energy to get into all the details right now, but please pray for us if you think about it.  Dwight threatened to commit suicide last night.  It was a very dramatic and emotional night, leading Scott to load him up in the car and take him to the children’s hospital by our house. 

They evaluated him and sent him home with the instructions to get him in to a psychiatrist Monday. 

I’ll post more later, but right now, like I said, I’m just emotionally and physically drained!

By the way, if you are a friend on Facebook, please don’t post any comments on there about this situation!  Thanks!

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You know those motivational posters providing a picture and definition for motivational words such as the one in the title? 

Here’s a mental picture for you:

Lock on the pantry door.

Teenage son so obsessed with sugar that he’s taken to eating handfuls of gummy vitamins in order to get his sugar fix.

Vitamins are now locked up too.

So what does he do?  Are you ready for this?

Picture my 15 year old son leaning over the bottom freezer drawer in the kitchen…stuffing frozen cookie dough in his mouth. 

Yes, I will never be able to say he isn’t determined.

But so am I.  I took the last few cookie dough pieces out and let them thaw.  Then I poured various “ingredients in the middle and covered them up.   Garlic Salt, Hot Red Pepper Powder, Garlic Tobasco!  Yum!  Then I put them back in.  The beauty of it all is he won’t be able to talk about it without giving himself away. 

Call me cruel, but I just love finding opportunities to prank my kids!

In the meantime, we started counseling yesterday.  He seems to be obsessed with anything “forbidden.”  She asked me if I’ve tried “giving him his own sugar free candy.”  I let her know that we’ve not only done that, but I’ve given him his own bag of REAL candy.  We’re not strict parent freaks trying to control him.  He ate his gallon-sized bag of candy in 3 days then started taking his siblings’ Halloween candy.  He’s also stolen my (and Scott’s) loose change to take to school to buy sweets.  That obviously wasn’t enough sugar so he decided to eat the gummy vitamins.  And now, the cookie dough. 

His counselor suggested he may have Asperger’s.  I looked up the symptoms online and he definitely seems to fit the definition.  Can’t help but think of the guy on Boston Legal.  It’s easier to laugh when it’s on t.v.!!!

It’s gonna be a crazy ride…but I have hope.

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Life has been rough the last year.  Real rough.  I’m not even going to pretend it has been easy!  Life with Dwight has been SO HARD.   He has really been struggling and there are days I think that he’s pushed me past my limits.  Maybe that’s why I finally got him enrolled in some counseling!

I’ve heard the expression that “God will not allow you to go through more than you can handle.”  But I have to respectfully disagree.  If God didn’t allow us to go through more than we could handle, why would we need Him?  I have been going through more than I could handle without Him…but because of Him, I am making it through, and I’m growing, and I am learning about new areas I need to completely rely on and trust and seek after Him.  I am at a point in my life where I can no longer be independent.  I NEED GOD.

And even though it is hard, it is such a liberating feeling to understand this and accept it!  I need Him!  Maybe it’s because I know that He will not let me down.  At the same time, it’s so humbling. 

I have just really been going through something the last couple of days that has humbled me.  Knowing how much I need God, knowing that we are going through some hard times right now, yet at the same time, God has continued to pour His blessings on me.  I’m honestly overwhelmed.  Here I have this teenage son who has so many issues and requires so much more than even the average teen, and it is so draining.  Most days I feel like I am giving, and giving, and giving!  I told my mom that he takes up about 85% of my energy and 50% of my free time.  Probably a slight exaggeration!  But the truth is, without him, life would just feel a bit empty. 

And then I look at each of my children.  They all require something of me, but they also bring something special to this family.  They are all different, but they all test me and suck me dry nearly every single day.  But I am so blessed.  Never in a million years would I have imagined I’d be living the life I have now.  I get to be the mom of Dwight, Patrick, Joshua, Kelly, Madison, and America!  Not only that, but I never thought I could have a husband who really gets it – who still treats me like a queen and tells me the things I need to hear on a daily basis.  After 11 years, he still makes me feel special – unique, like I’m THE ONE AND ONLY. 

Yes, things are hard.  There are moments I lose it and I want to pull my hair out, but WOW.  I am just so blessed to be the one who gets to live this life, to be the mother of these awesome kids and the wife to this amazing man.

I may be giving a lot lately, but God is giving so much more.  I am so thankful!

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get ready.  This is the kind of stuff they’ll do!Door

See how the door is sticking out more on top than on bottom?  That’s because Dwight and Patrick pulled the door off its hinges.  Yup.  Dwight thought it would be funny to shut the laundry room door on Patrick while he was in there, so Patrick tried to get out. 

Best of all, they did this on Scott’s birthday!  Happy Birthday, Dad!

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